Will my scars forever ruin all of God's plans?
God's divine design was for baby girls and boys to grow up with both their mommy and daddy. Unfortunately, in our shattered world families are broken up and torn apart.
God gave us the His pattern in Genesis 2:24, "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."
A man would leave his father and mother and take a wife. They would be fruitful and multiply. The children would benefit from both parents, as each one would bring different and necessary facets to the child's life. This was the pattern, the divine design.
There is power in a father. He brings something to the family relationship that only he can bring because God created him in that role. And when he's missing little girls fill that void with anyone and everything because they desire for the pain to go away. When we let anger at our fathers turn to pain... we just transfer it to others that we love. We begin to ruin our God given, blessed relationships.
God didn't want there to be a missing link in our family, but sometimes He allows it. I'm learning that I can be thankful because although I let Satan rule my hurt, God has taken it over to transform it. He can use my brokenness. He can redeem pain and transform it into something strong, solid, and powerful. I have to be willing to let it go.
I don't know how unbelievers without fathers make it. I'm weak to begin with, so I don't know what I would do without Christ. As Christians we have to learn to be patient letting God fill our hearts. But what does a non-Christian do? That's heartbreaking. I'm not sure why God chose to fill me up with himself.
The hardest thing for me to understand right now is the reasons God allowed me to grow up without a father, or with the abusive one I had. And especially because He gave me the man of His and my dreams before I was ready... knowing that I wasn't going to wait on His timing.
I've learned that long before a girl finds her first real boyfriend or falls in love, her attitude toward men has been shaped quietly by her father. Why? Because the father-daughter relationship sets the stage for all future romantic involvements. If a young woman's father rejects her, she'll spend her life trying to find a man who can meet the needs he never fulfilled in her heart. If he rejects her as unattractive and uninteresting, she's likely to carry self-image problems into her adult years. If he was overbearing, uncaring, or capricious during her developmental years, she may disrespect her husband and question his judgment. That was me.
This has been a fear, bondage, baggage, pure captivity for me. Satan told me that I couldn't ever have a marriage God intended because of my family life. I lived my last relationship believing his lies; therefore, ruining all good that God wanted to create and give.
A good father will leave his imprint on a daughter's heart for the rest of her life, but not every girl has that. So, all I know is my Great Father has nail scared imprints on his hands for the rest of eternity.
Now I have to let God change my image and ideas of fathers, so I can learn to trust my husband and see myself differently. Girls can see their fathers in a positive light also, which effects them positively. I'm never going to have a "good" earthly father to learn from. But look WHO I get to, Jesus himself. Can it get any better?... :)
When fathers are warm and nurturing, girls look for a lover to equal him. If he thinks she's beautiful and feminine, she'll be inclined to see herself that way. If a father blended love and discipline in a way that conveyed strength, she may be more comfortable with a give-and-take marriage characterized by mutual respect.
I get to be loved by our Heavenly Father, King of kings and Lord of lords. I get to see what a father/daughter and marriage relationship looks like according to Him who created both! He's making it unhindered by my past! He's giving me new eyes and a new heart to carry all of this.
I thought my scars were going to forever ruin His plans. But I am a new creation, and He doesn't even see me with scars. He sees me as His princess, who He's changing, not letting go of, and planning for at this moment.
There's always Hope and Light because of Him.
God gave us the His pattern in Genesis 2:24, "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh."
A man would leave his father and mother and take a wife. They would be fruitful and multiply. The children would benefit from both parents, as each one would bring different and necessary facets to the child's life. This was the pattern, the divine design.
There is power in a father. He brings something to the family relationship that only he can bring because God created him in that role. And when he's missing little girls fill that void with anyone and everything because they desire for the pain to go away. When we let anger at our fathers turn to pain... we just transfer it to others that we love. We begin to ruin our God given, blessed relationships.
God didn't want there to be a missing link in our family, but sometimes He allows it. I'm learning that I can be thankful because although I let Satan rule my hurt, God has taken it over to transform it. He can use my brokenness. He can redeem pain and transform it into something strong, solid, and powerful. I have to be willing to let it go.
I don't know how unbelievers without fathers make it. I'm weak to begin with, so I don't know what I would do without Christ. As Christians we have to learn to be patient letting God fill our hearts. But what does a non-Christian do? That's heartbreaking. I'm not sure why God chose to fill me up with himself.
The hardest thing for me to understand right now is the reasons God allowed me to grow up without a father, or with the abusive one I had. And especially because He gave me the man of His and my dreams before I was ready... knowing that I wasn't going to wait on His timing.
I've learned that long before a girl finds her first real boyfriend or falls in love, her attitude toward men has been shaped quietly by her father. Why? Because the father-daughter relationship sets the stage for all future romantic involvements. If a young woman's father rejects her, she'll spend her life trying to find a man who can meet the needs he never fulfilled in her heart. If he rejects her as unattractive and uninteresting, she's likely to carry self-image problems into her adult years. If he was overbearing, uncaring, or capricious during her developmental years, she may disrespect her husband and question his judgment. That was me.
This has been a fear, bondage, baggage, pure captivity for me. Satan told me that I couldn't ever have a marriage God intended because of my family life. I lived my last relationship believing his lies; therefore, ruining all good that God wanted to create and give.
A good father will leave his imprint on a daughter's heart for the rest of her life, but not every girl has that. So, all I know is my Great Father has nail scared imprints on his hands for the rest of eternity.
Now I have to let God change my image and ideas of fathers, so I can learn to trust my husband and see myself differently. Girls can see their fathers in a positive light also, which effects them positively. I'm never going to have a "good" earthly father to learn from. But look WHO I get to, Jesus himself. Can it get any better?... :)
When fathers are warm and nurturing, girls look for a lover to equal him. If he thinks she's beautiful and feminine, she'll be inclined to see herself that way. If a father blended love and discipline in a way that conveyed strength, she may be more comfortable with a give-and-take marriage characterized by mutual respect.
I get to be loved by our Heavenly Father, King of kings and Lord of lords. I get to see what a father/daughter and marriage relationship looks like according to Him who created both! He's making it unhindered by my past! He's giving me new eyes and a new heart to carry all of this.
I thought my scars were going to forever ruin His plans. But I am a new creation, and He doesn't even see me with scars. He sees me as His princess, who He's changing, not letting go of, and planning for at this moment.
There's always Hope and Light because of Him.
posted by Holly at 11:38 AM
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